no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize