I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Randomize
