don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
