But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize