I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
