so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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