i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
