im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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