Its about making memories worth repressing
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
My ATM looks so different sober.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
