Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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