I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
