so that wasnt chicken after all
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Randomize