How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
