yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
