Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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