If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize