I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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