you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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