why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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