Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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