i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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