I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize