I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
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