I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
