Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
