69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
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