is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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