So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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