And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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