I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize