I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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