i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
