do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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