I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
