Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
