You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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