Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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