She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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