STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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