i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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