Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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