Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i will never coherently bang her
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
