True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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