we're blogging at a bar
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
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