Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
