i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize