All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
