We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize