awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
