thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
