woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize