3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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